All the Boys Love Mandy Lane

All the Boys Love Mandy Lane

A slasher film about virginity, that’s not really new. Basically all the slashers are about virginity as it’s always the virgin female that is the last one standing against a mad man she without a doubt will defeat. Cherry Falls took a play on virginity making the killer actually pick out virgins as his/her (watch the movie, you’ll understand the gender confusion) victim. In All the Boys Love Mandy Lane the lead character, that would be the titular Mandy, is a virgin and is on the top of every boys’ list. The cherry popping kind of list. Why Mandy is a virgin while everybody else doing the deed on a regular basis remains unclear. She’s not very religious (and if she was she would have quite a confession) or something like that, and there are enough cute boys around. My only guess was she was waiting for Mr right. Or maybe she’s waiting for a Ms Right.

The movie is about, you guessed it, Mandy Lane. A girl every boy seems to want. Why? Well, not either is she a stunning creature but she also happens to be a virgin. And as in all American films dealing with teenagers’ virginity is a big thing. Mandy has a best friend, a best male friend that is end his name is Emmet. Now these kinds of male friend actually want one thing: fuck their best female friend and so does Emmet. But, he’s kinda like the brother to her and he has to witness how all the boys around him get blown off by Mandy but he knows that one day one will actually succeed. In the opening scene we see the first (there will be more) glimpses of Emmets disturbing behavior as he coaches a drunk jock to jump off the roof into the pool to impress Mandy. He literally hits rock bottom.
Skip 9 months and Emmet seems to be out of the picture with Mandy. She gets invited to a weekend out at the ranch of one of her fellow students. 3 boys, 3 girls and a ranch help to keep an eye on things, what could go wrong? A lot when somebody starts picking off this group of teens one by one.

All the Boys Love Mandy Lane screen

All the Boys Love Mandy Lane is a slasher film in a less pure form. It breaks some conventions but not too many. The core of the movie must consist of characters we care about for the movie to be chilling and the characters in Mandy Lane are not really those kind of characters. I kept wondering what kind of a group of friends this was. I mean they never convince as being friends with each other. There’s Mandy, with her mysterious reason to be a virgin whoh as been “hustled” by her friend Chloe into coming with them. Chloe seems to have instructions from Red, one of the guys who of course wants to deflower Mandy. The same Chloe also calls her and Mandy’s friend Marlin constantly fat. While she is far from it actually. Just take a look at the picture below. We have Chloe, Marlin and Mandy from left to right. Now is that a fat chick or what? I didn’t think so, but if you’re such good friends then why call your friend constantly fat? What a bitch.
I’m wondering what Mandy is doing along for the ride as she knows everybody is trying to score her poontang. One of the guys is Jake. He receives blowjob from Marlin and when she naturally expects for him to go down on her he blows (ha ha) her off en gets back to the ranch to complete his conquest of virginal paradise. If you can give me a reason why these kids are friends and not just fuck buddies please tell me.

Now the movie is fairly straight forward and doesn’t do a hard job to conceal the identity of the killer. The makers realize this and thus his identity is revealed relatively early on. I think most people will see the twist coming at the end of the movie. The scenario did cross my mind in the beginning but it did grab me by surprise I must say, but just a little. It was one of those “Ha, I knew it” moments.
All the Boys Love Mandy Lane is not a very good slasher, but it doesn’t bore also. I was put off by the cinematography as there is constantly an over-saturated look on the film in every scene with sunshine. It’s as if there wasn’t any originally and they got carried away in post-production. The film is gory and nasty, and at some point goes even into torture-porn territory with one victim getting mutilated like those in Hostel.

At the end of the movie all the boys loved Mandy Lane and we never did. But we did get an acceptable slasher, but unfortunately nothing more.

All the Boys Love Mandy Lane Screenshot
Seriously, does my belly button smell?
All the Boys Love Mandy Lane
All the Boys Love Mandy Lane Poster
All the Boys Love Mandy Lane


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