Transporter 3

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As a spawn of the 70’s I grew up with one-man-armies stopping communism singlehandedly before lunch in the form of Arnold, Sly, Steven and Jean-Claude. Those were fun days. But since most of those guys are now in their 60’s they are ready for retirement. At least on the actionfront. of course there’s a whole new generation anxious to follow in their footsteps... or is there? Today we’ll just have to do with someone like Matt Damon doing a role which would be reserved for Steven Seagal 15 years ago. There are some exceptions though; The Rock, Vin Diesel and Jason Staham all made a couple of 80’s actioners in this millenium. The first 2 have been taking shots at other genres lately. Jason however keeps the guns blazing and the 80’s alive!

In Transporter 3 we once again follow the never boring life of Frank Martin who transports packages by a strict set of rules and has a higher delivery rate than FedEx. This time his package is a lovely freckled eastern-european girl which he is forced to transport from France to somewhere in Eastern Europe. Added catch here is that he’s doing this against his will and to make him cooperate he gets a unremovable bracelet which will explode if he ever moves as far away from the car as 75ft. Or the car from him for that matter. Those who are awake see parallels with another Staham franchise; Crank. Some of you might even scream "Wedlock" right now!

Ok so originality isn’t this movies strongest suite. That honor goes to the fight and stuntsequences which are all as slick as you would expect. The editing during fights is sometimes a tad too kinetic but other than that they are fun to watch. There are some really nice stunts, most of them done with cars. I really liked a sequence were a car was driving on two wheels between two trucks. Nice! In the end this movie goes way over the top as Frank goes into the water with car. No that’s a dilemma; stay up while the car sinks and you’ll be blown up, go down with the car and you’ll drown. Not an average choice one makes on a daily basis.

Transporter 3 is by no means a good movie, but it is a fun movie and that’s what it’s supposed to do; entertain us for about 90 minutes. It did just that and teached me a good lesson; always have something inflateable in your car, you never know if your car ends up in the water.

"Dad, I’ve discovered that wearing heavy eyeshadow does not make people not notice my freckles"